The Messy Side
I like systems, I like structure, I like finding formulas that work. The logical side of my brain is comforted, at peace and functions beautifully when I am in control of my circumstances. There’s little worse than after much planning, the end product isn’t what I hoped for.
About a year ago I buckled up and committed to producing a painting a week. Mainly the goal was to obtain the skill to see an image of nature and create a work of art conveying the emotion of the scene. Little did I know that getting to that point would require an insane amount of patience, endurance and determination.
Painting was always present in my life and I enjoyed it as a outlet for when I was feeling ‘some sort of way.’ It wasn’t until I took it on seriously when so many frustrations began to arise. I was learning new rules, what colors complement each other, how composition works, what brushes to use, etc. I thought each rule was like a power tool, you learn it exists, how it could help you and BAM! you now have it in your tool belt. The part that books don’t teach was knowing exactly when, how and where to use these new tools when sitting in front of a blank canvas.
Although the growing pains of becoming a great artist have been rough, I take great pride in all the failures and messy work. Learning how to harness the power of these tools has been a roller coaster as their functions slowly begin to make sense. Each painting which I consider subpar I still esteem highly because I know it’s part of the process. Nurturing this gift is a like raising a child. Some days better other days worse. The best part is that it’s just begun and we got a lot of growing to do!
To all the artists that are also figuring it out, keep going!
Check out a few paintings that didn’t turn out quite as planned:
Trees and Hills, 2020, Oil on Panel, 8x 10in
In this series of paintings (which weren’t intended on being a series in the first place) was supposed to capture a vast and mysterious opening in the trees I came across in the country on a cloudy day. I was struck by how beautiful and serene it all looked. Grabbing some paint and a panel I got to work. To say the least, I didn’t like the first, or the second, or the third, or the fourth, or the fifth rendition. Looking back it’s beautiful to see the perseverance in trying to capture the emotion of the scene.
Fall Path, 2020, Oil on Panel, 8x10in
This painting was preceded by much planning and sketching. During the first try at the painting I got so discouraged that I didn’t attempt to complete it by covering the underpainting markings. However all hope was not lost! As I started painting the same scene on a different board I noticed how the final did not match the image I had in my mind. Although neither managed to encompass my imagination I learned more about how different colors interact with each other as well as the importance of tone in landscape paintings.
